#30: Slowly, Gently

I found myself saying this to my daughter one lunchtime. She was playing with the belt of her high chair and hurt her hand on the table as she was violently swinging it.


"Himig, do things slowly and gently. That way, you'll avoid hurting yourself."


Well it's true. gentleness will benefit you whether you are driving a vehicle or chopping some onions. moving in frantic hurry almost always leaves a trail of clutter, spills and sometimes, broken coffee mugs. 


"Slowly, Himig. Move gently next time"


As the words left my lips, I felt like I wasn't only telling this to my child. I felt like I am saying this to the whole of mankind.
Our society indeed needs to heed this. So far, with the thirty years that I have lived, I have seen more harm than good when the people around me try to do things quicker. It's the malady of our "instant society". We try to expedite everything. We make quick decisions that leads to tragedies and heartaches. We are scared of waiting thinking that the world will leave us to eat its dust. That's why we jump into the first opportunity we get without caring if the wagon we jumped in is on it's way to the garbage dump. This world has brain-washed us to adapt its rat race culture where results, action and production are more important than things that take time such as friendships and family. 


Then when you're done running around like a headless chicken after things that in the end you realize you don't need, you wonder why the things that matter are nowhere near. You wonder why this boyfriend takes you for granted, why our children hate us, why our wife has become a stranger again or why at the end of the day, when it's dark and quiet, we feel lonely despite of all the entertainment that is within our reach. That is because sometimes, we don't allow ourselves to just do things slowly, gently. We have to recognize that the things that takes time, the things that doesn't have shortcuts, are the ones that matters, that makes us significant.


So do yourself a favor. Do things slowly, gently. Feel all the textures of your life. Spend time with your children even if it takes them a decade or two to have sensible conversations with you. Take time to feel the joy and even the excruciating pain. Learn to quiet down and listen to someone, to the wind, or to silence. Hear yourself think and find out what really matters to you. Before you give in to a sudden desire, think again and ask yourself if ten years from now, you can look back at this moment and be proud. Don't let everything happen all at once because there is always a time for everything.